Drunken Jr
by chibisamalove
Summary: Just a silly oneshot of Jr. getting drunk and MOMO's reaction to it.  Rating due to Jr.'s wonderful mouth.


**Author's note – **This is just an idea that came to me when talking to Princess Artemis one time. I'm not particularly looking to offend any Jr.xMOMO fans out there, but I'm not going to apologize for having the idea, either. The thought of Jr. getting drunk and MOMO's reaction to it is something I just had to write. The timeline is between Episode II and III.

**Disclaimer - **This would be what I forgot before. -smacks self in forehead- Anyway, none of these characters belong to me. They are the property of Bandai-Namco and Monolithsoft. It's been a while since I put up a new story, so I forgot this part of it. XD

Jr. slammed the door on the way out of the office he shared with Gaignun, ignoring both Mary and Shelley as they called after him. _He waltzes off to Fifth Jerusalem and sticks me with all the damn paperwork! He knows I don't have any interest in dealing with that, or dealing with the public relations like he does! Damn you, Gaignun. I bet you're busy laughing your ass off over there, aren't you?!_ His first thought of cooling down after plowing through the mess Gaignun had left him was to hit the beach. Maybe if he spent a few hours swimming and not really thinking about much, his temper would reach a more normal level. "Screw it," he muttered. "I'll con Kaito at the bar into giving me a couple of drinks. He likes to talk tough, but I always win out in the end."

He stopped at his room before heading out to put on a more comfortable set of clothes, and once again his temper rose. "I can't even be comfortable when I'm dealing with that stuff, because they expect me to be all **professional**!" He mimicked Shelley's tone when she'd seen what he was wearing before he'd entered the office earlier in the day. "Like Helmer's gonna care if I'm dressed properly or not. All he cares about is that the mission he hands out gets taken care of." He slipped into a pair of blue jeans and a lighter blue turtleneck paired with a dark blue sweater. He pulled on his tan suede chaps over the jeans and sighed. "This is a helluva lot better than a damn suit. Gaignun's got some serious issues, being able to live in that suit the way he does." He jammed his feet into a pair of brown cowboy boots, slid his arms into one of his favorite duster jackets, and hurried out the door.

It didn't take him long to enter the Foundation, and his eyes slid to the _Iron Man_ bar longingly. "If a couple of drinks doesn't get me feeling better, then nothing will." He waved to a few of the residents who were calling a hello out to Little Master and disappeared inside the bar.

Kaito saw him approaching the bar and shook his head. "Did you see that horrific episode of _Iron 4_?" he questioned in disgust. "They're making them unfit to watch these days, I tell ya. So, what can I do for you today, Little Master?"

Jr. replied, "I had a really sucky day, so I'm looking to forget about it. Give me a shot of tequila, would you?"

"Little Master, I'm not helping you to get drunk the way you did last time. Master Gaignun just about handed my head to me because he had to come and drag you out of here!" Kaito was backing up, his hands in front of him.

"Yeah, well, Gaignun ain't here to come and get me, is he? He's off at Fifth Jerusalem, laughing while he buries me in a bunch of crap! So, either give me the tequila or I'll get it my damn self!" Jr. snapped, already heading toward the end of the bar.

"Okay, I'll get it for you then! Just swear I won't get myself in any trouble for doing this!" Kaito poured the tequila into a shot glass and handed it to the Little Master quickly.

Jr. picked it up and downed it instantly. He slammed the glass back down. "Just keep 'em coming, and you don't need to worry about any trouble…"

An hour or so later, his head was sufficiently fuzzy from all the alcohol he'd imbibed. He kicked back his feet on the chair across from him and folded his arms behind his head. He let out a yell as the chair he was sitting in tilted back too far, spilling him onto the floor. "Dammit all to hell!" he swore, attempting to get to his feet. The world began spinning crazily, and he collapsed. "Crap, might a' well jus' hang den…" His speech was starting to slur as the alcohol caught up to him in his system.

"Jr., are you all right?" a soft voice asked from above him. It sounded vaguely familiar, and he spent a moment trying to place it in his head.

"MOMO, how come dere's, like, two o' ya?" he said in a confused tone, tilting his head back to look up at her.

"No, there's only one of me," she answered. "I came looking for you after Mary and Shelley told me you'd left for the day, and in a bad mood, too."

"Damn G-G-Gaignun stuck me wid da paper…stuff," he complained, grabbing hold of the chair in a vain attempt to get back up.

MOMO reached down to take hold of his arm. "Please allow me to help you up. I don't like to see you struggling like that," she told him. Her eyes widened when he threw her off.

"I don't need no damn 'elp!" he said combatively. "I ain't got a problem wid gettin' to my feet!" He managed to stand up, swaying heavily. "Who the hell needs ya?"

MOMO's golden eyes filled with tears. "I'm sorry. I just saw you were having trouble trying to get up, and I wished to help."

"I weren't havin' no trouble!" he roared at her, and she took a frightened step back. "Both o' ya just need to leave me…alone!" He reached out and grabbed the edge of the table as he tripped over his own feet. "Whoa! Dammit!"

"Would you…like me to help you get back to your room?" she asked haltingly. "I'm not sure it's a good idea you try it on your own, Jr."

He waved her away, annoyance radiating from him along with the strong alcohol fumes. "I'm fine, I said! I can make it!" He took a step away from the table and fell over one of the chairs. "Damn piece o' crap jumped in front o' me," he said with wide eyes, rubbing his left shin when it was his right that was smarting.

MOMO reached down again to help him. "Jr., I think it's for the best if I help you get back. I don't think it was wise for you to drink like that. You can barely stand," she said quietly.

"I don't need no help, and I don't need no motherin'! Do me a favor and take a hike!" His cruel words finally sent her from the bar, tears streaming down her face. A few seconds afterward, Jr. fell to the floor face-first, drunkenly passed out.

Early the next afternoon, he opened his eyes and immediately regretted it. "Damn, my head feels like it's gonna split open," he groaned, bringing his hands to his throbbing head. Through slitted eyes, he saw he'd somehow been returned to his bed. "How the hell did I get back here?"

"Shelley an' I dragged ya, ya lump," Mary said as she entered the room. "Ya ain't so light after ya been drinkin', ya know." She stood before him, hands on her hips.

"How'd you know where I was?" He closed his eyes again, wishing the throbbing would stop so he could think clearly.

"Because ya really hurt poor MOMO, and she came to us, cryin'. Poor thin' was just devastated at how ya talked to her and all. As mad as we both were, we couldn't just leave ya lyin' on the floor of the _Iron Man_. So we dragged ya on back and dumped ya in bed." Mary pinned him with an uncharacteristic glare. "Ya better get up and go tell that lil' girl how sorry ya are for bein' so mean."

"I'll tell her when my head stops feeling like it's going to fall off if I move it. Damn, I love drinking, but it sure as hell doesn't love me." He carefully curled up, moving his head minimally, and Mary left the room huffily.

**Author's note 2 – **So there it is. Now that it's out of my head, I can get back to work on some other stuff. No flames, please. I dislike the Jr.xMOMO pairing, and no amount of flaming is going to change that.


End file.
